by Perrin Holloway

An HSP is a Highly Sensitive Person, and we comprise around 15 to 20 percent of the population. That means that, unlike most people, we experience emotions profoundly, which can sometimes flood or overwhelm our nervous systems. HSPs experience stimulation differently because of biological differences in our nervous systems that process senses more intensely than the average person, resulting in mental overload.

Being a HSP is like being the eternal oddball at every single occurrence of your entire life. Lights are always too bright, sounds too loud, smells aggressive, and textures; let’s not even get into that. It’s having to hide your sensitivities, which ultimately means hiding yourself. Going with the flow but never fully grasping what the flow is. You’ve probably been asked, “Can’t you just get over it?” more times than you can count. And it seems like no matter how much rest you get, you are always tired. Walking through the airport feels like a careful dance across a minefield. Dodging panic attacks, overheating, and praying you’ve landed before reaching your gate. HSPs know all too well when the TV is too loud, even when the volume is low. We prefer music from a speaker and absolutely cringe when played out loud over the phone. We agonize over unwanted, crowded, loud social interactions such as parties. We are constantly frustrated at restaurant noise levels and the far too bright fluorescent lights in retail stores.

What You Can Do

• Plan for large crowds and noisy environments 

• Noise canceling headphones

• Get enough sleep

• Set boundaries and honor your sensitivity

• Establish a quiet, safe place to retreat 

Ways To Value Your Sensitivity

• Spend time with friends who respect your boundaries

• Establish mutually supportive friendships

• Practice self-compassion 

• Set aside time to wind down after a busy day

• Give yourself permission to lean into overwhelming feelings

There’s an extraordinary beauty in identifying and accepting your differences. After all, sensitivities are our first language, and for as long as you can remember, no one else has spoken that language. The combination of self-criticism and unnecessary guilt has made it incredibly difficult to see your strengths as anything but bad. Believe it or not, when you embrace your observation skills and reptile-like awareness, you begin to see it as a gift and less of a burden. It is akin to putting on glasses for the first time and recognizing the green blobs on trees are leaves. From what I’ve learned, don’t spend too much time trying to desensitize yourself; instead, show those very parts of you compassion and grace.